COLUMN #42: How a Thick Skin, Short Memory, and Sense of Humor Help You Thrive at Work

Dear Glinda: Career advice and inspiration for powerful souls like you.

As Glinda the Good Witch said, “You’ve always had the power. You’ve had it all along.”

Dear Readers,

This week we’re digging deep into the archives of Glinda’s career to share some early advice I received that has proven durable and evergreen.

When I was just starting out in real estate development at 25 years old, my very first boss said: "Cara, if you're going to make it in development, you better have 2 things: a thick skin and and short memory."

After 20 years in housing development and launching two businesses of my own, I'd say that's extremely good advice.

I'd add a 3rd as well - a sense of humor.

Here's why...

THICK SKIN

• Lots of barbs get thrown about in the pressure cooker development business, and 95% percent of the time, they are not personal, and must be allowed to fly on by. Otherwise they are distracting and draining and deter us from our purpose.

• If they are personal, deal with them directly and right in the face - do not let them simmer or grow into resentment. Do not gossip or tattle. If you can deal with things head on, with integrity, and with a degree of diplomacy, you'll go far.

SHORT MEMORY

• I sometimes would joke with my developer clients that our business was like waking up each day and getting punched in the face. New barriers pop up all the time that threaten the survival of projects (government, NIMBY, economy, pandemic, etc.).

• Even if you are a natural "meerkat" (as my husband says I am) on the lookout for threats on the horizon, you sometimes get taken by surprise with ridiculousness you never saw coming.

• Your job is not to lament these, but to remain nimble, adaptable, and endlessly creative when finding a pathway out/ around/ through.

• Once you've worked with your awesome network and team to figure out a way to be even better than before, forget about the hurdle (but remember the lesson learned) and move on. Another will arrive soon enough and you'll need your energy for that.

SENSE OF HUMOR

• Isn't this just a prerequisite of living?

• Most of the challenges we face are not actually life or death, and if we can retain a bit of levity, we are in a much better headspace to solve problems without getting bogged down in the depths of frustration and despair.

• We're also a lot more pleasant to be around, and folks on all sides of the aisle are more likely to want to collaborate with us on a crafty win-win solution.

• At the end of the day, we're here to create something beautiful, useful, and lasting, and we need to put our best energy into it for it to thrive.

FINALLY

• Everything passes, the good, bad, and ugly.

• If we can remember that, and know that in a few weeks or months this issue will be a distant memory, but the people we work with and the work we create will endure, we can remain focused on the long game.

• And our relentless commitment to excellence, shared success, and what "really matters" will be our legacy.